You may have just ended a long-term relationship with a guy and are not emotionally ready to get involved in a new one yet. Maybe you want to “walk” a little before settling down and starting a family. Or you’re too busy building an amazing career and you don’t have time for a serious relationship. In any of these cases (and in many others), a fling will come to your rescue.
Intimacy for one night, an affair or sex without obligations – to designate all these types of easy relationships in the modern world they have invented one capacious name – “fling”. There are entire communities and dating sites where flingers “live”, share their experiences and look for like-minded people. Intrigued? Then remember a few simple rules that will help turn a fleeting connection into a real unforgettable adventure.
1. Find the right partner
There are several safe bets where you can meet a man exclusively for sex:
on thematic sites or dating sites;
in places where you will see each other for the first time and, most likely, will never meet again (for example, in a nightclub or at a concert);
during a foreign resort, on vacation;
anywhere with any man, if you are suddenly inflamed with a passion for him (and he does not mind answering you in return);
with someone you know (a risky but acceptable option), who, like you, expects only high-quality sex from meetings.
2. Safety and security
Despite the fact that the affair is temporary, its consequences can stay with you for a long time, so always remember about safety. A short-term intimate relationship can be an unforgettable meeting, if it does not lead to STDs and unwanted pregnancy. Do not rely on a partner, take care of the means of protection yourself. Remember: a girl’s best friend is, of course, diamonds, but only after condoms. Fling often involves sex with unfamiliar men. Be careful in choosing such lovers. Often on dating sites, scammers, scammers, criminals and simply inadequate people can “inhabit”.
3. Strong “no” to the ex
Fling does not imply emotional dependence on a partner. The point is to get physical pleasure without getting attached to each other. Now think, can such a connection arise between people who once experienced mutual feelings, and, perhaps, are still in love? Of course not. Such intercourse will be called: “last chance”, “hope for a continuation” or “last intimacy”, but definitely not fling. So the ex should be removed from the list of potential aspirants for no-obligation sex once and for all.
4. Set clear rules
If sex with a man is repeated or even turned into irregular, but still meetings, this is permissible, however, certain rules will have to be discussed and carefully followed. While some partners see each other solely for the purpose of intimate pleasure, others are not opposed to a casual dinner or watching a movie together. You must honestly discuss this with each other and choose the best route for your relationship. Establish the format of meetings, the form of communication, the frequency of visits, the frequency and appropriateness of calls. In any case, do not forget that no one owes anything to anyone. It’s just a fling. Don’t expect more. Understanding the transient nature of your relationship will help you not to blur their boundaries and communicate strictly within this framework, avoiding unnecessary consequences.
5. Say goodbye in time
Brief encounters for sex should be that way. Don’t turn fling into romance by letting your partner stay overnight or long after intercourse. Your task is to give each other pleasure in bed, so outside the bed and try not to go out. Experiment, bring a man to exhaustion with your caresses and let him fulfill your wildest fantasies, trying a variety of poses and techniques, indulge in insane passion together … and then disperse to rest and gain strength before the next meeting.
6. Don’t introduce him to his parents
Do not forget that a passing hobby is your own business, in which there is no place for outsiders. If the status of a relationship is not just temporary, but also created for a specific purpose, is it worth taking it to a new level by introducing a sex partner to your parents, friends or children? Most likely, your exciting romance will also suddenly end as it began, and it will be much easier for you to switch to another partner if everyone around you does not pester you with questions about where the man who was with you last time went. In addition, if you introduce your family to each of your lovers, you risk acquiring a dubious reputation, because not everyone preaches free views on intimate life.
7. Don’t give or accept gifts
Firstly, most often people who are financially independent devote their time to the fling. The main goal of such a relationship is to provide sexual pleasure, to receive emotional relaxation, and not gifts for their services. Secondly, presentations stimulate the emergence of mutual affection. This is more than a non-committal date under a blanket. Gifts imply gratitude, mutual sympathy, some feelings … In short, if your plans do not include the courtship of your partner, which can develop into something more serious than just sex, then – no gifts!
8. “No” to other people’s toothbrushes in the bathroom
Make sure that you do not leave your belongings with your lover (be aware of the potential fragility of your relationship). Also, make sure that your partner does not forget their personal belongings in your apartment. No linen, no toothbrush, no razor – nothing with which he could designate “his” territory. As soon as his hygiene items or wardrobe items imperceptibly “move” into your bathroom or bedroom, before you have time to look back, you will be washing his dishes and washing clothes. This, of course, is okay, if that was the purpose of your connection.
9. Control your emotions
In a relationship without commitment, there is no place for insecurity or jealousy. If you have chosen this type of meeting, then you should correspond to it with dignity, and not rush from the image of a freedom-loving hetera to the image of a suspicious owner. To impose, excessively need a man, attack him on the phone, try to tie him to yourself – all this testifies to only one thing: fling is not for you, better engage in finding a suitable, worthy and permanent partner.
10. Get ready to break up
All the previous nine points were needed only for one thing: you must be ready to forget about this guy at any time. No matter how good you are together. Remember that you are in a relationship as long as you have mutual attraction. If sex develops into something more (and this is not part of your plans), leave. If he starts treating you badly, leave. If you fall in love with another, leave. If he is the initiator of the gap, just accept it and live on, looking closely at other handsome men.
Bonus: Have fun!
Remember: in modern society there are many different types of relationships between people. Each person plays by his own rules, choosing the type of intimate relationship that suits him best. If at this stage of your life the fling seems to have been created just for you, do not hesitate, but enjoy it. Think about the fact that perhaps more in your life you will not have such a chance: to indulge in passion uncontrollably and at the same time avoid all the unpleasant household chores of living together. Enjoy multiple orgasms from your partner. Later, being married for a dozen years with your beloved husband, you will dreamily remember them.
Of course, fling isn’t for everyone. It takes a certain amount of courage to abandon the stereotypes of society and build a personal life at your own discretion. If you are looking for a partner for a serious relationship, fling is not for you. You should also not start free communication with a guy that you like for a long time, in the hope that easy sex will develop into a great bright feeling. If this does not happen, most likely, only you will suffer in this situation. To avoid pain and embarrassment, think in advance about what awaits you and whether you are willing to put up with it. If yes, great. Then relax and enjoy! Sex, every moment and the amazing variety that life gives us!