Quarrel Rules

Often, quarrels in couples end in toxic consequences. This happens when an argument degenerates into mutual accusations, criticism and sometimes even insults. The couple has already forgotten how it all began, but it will not be possible to forget the offensive words uttered during the controversy.

Today I’m telling you how to throw out negative emotions in an environmentally friendly way and at the same time find the key to solving the problem that started it all.

  1. Determine the purpose of the quarrel: if you are not going to part with your partner and want to live in harmony, then your goal is a compromise.
  2. Don’t go off topic. As soon as you forget what started it all, the scenario of the quarrel will turn over in a negative direction.
  3. Do not rush into value judgments and listing shortcomings against your partner: otherwise it will not be an argument, but defense and attack.
  4. Learn to solve problems calmly: make a habit of allowing everyone to speak for a certain amount of time, then step back from the dialogue for half an hour and only after thinking about what was said, return to the conversation. It’s difficult, but extremely effective. The time that you give yourself and your partner to think will have a very positive effect on the outcome of the conflict.
  5. Do not use abusive methods: do not manipulate, do not threaten, do not compare your partner with others, do not hit the dishes.
  6. Do not drag in past grievances, you are solving a current problem, not something from the past. ⠀⠀
  7. Suggest a solution. Give your partner the options for resolving the issue and try to argue them.
  8. Make peace before the end of the day. It is important not to go to bed with negative emotions.
    How to understand that the quarrel ended in an environmentally friendly way? You and your partner feel calm and satisfied: there are no more reproaches and resentments for the problem that has arisen.

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