What if the partner does not devote time to foreplay? How to convince a person of the need for proper preparation for sex? There are several approaches that will help make intimacy more enjoyable and interesting; using them will allow you to bring something new into your communication and take sex to a new level.
Why is there no prelude?
Most often it is men who miss foreplay. They need very little time for excitement, kisses, hugs are not necessary for them, and they believe that women do not need all this. In such a situation, the man simply does not understand the difference between the sexes. And to begin with, he should tell about it.
Inexperienced people meet , this is a common occurrence. But they do not do something not because they do not want or do not like it. They just don’t know what is needed. And here the moment of enlightenment is important, you need to make it clear to the person that the preparation stage is important. But you need to speak without claim, not blaming, but simply talking about ways to improve intimacy.
In this case, insults, screams or accusations will not help. He just won’t understand what exactly you want from him. Here it is important to give instructions : what and how to do, and also explain – why do it.
A man can understand what a woman needs, but not do it. For your reasons. Psychological trauma, beliefs, features of education can affect sex. For example, touching the genitals for him may be unacceptable, and for someone oral sex is prohibited. There are men who are afraid to be gentle, considering it a weakness.
And here it is important to find out why he is against slow preparation for sex . A regular conversation will help. A woman can start with an offer to try something. Sometimes you can talk about your interest in certain actions and study his reaction. From the answer it will be clear what exactly is stopping him. But can this be changed is a difficult question. Sometimes it takes time to adjust the point of view, sometimes it does not work. Understanding his position, you can come to terms with her or leave. Uncertainty is inconvenient, but understanding what is happening is the key to a solution.
Lack of interest
Sometimes a man cares only about himself . And then he is simply not interested in the pleasure of a woman. He is not ready to try, try to “make” or “appease” her. It is more important for him to get his feelings. And then there is no prelude, since he does not want to do this. The problem is that there is no emotional connection , no feelings or love. And to fix something here is difficult. You can confront a person with the fact – “do it or you won’t get anything yourself.” But only this does not always work. And the prelude, when he does not get pleasure, can become torture. If there is no interest, it is better not to continue sexual contact. And do not try to repeat it again.
How to create a prelude
Prelude is not only a few minutes before sex, it can last several hours. This is a flirtation before the process , this is the period when partners “get their appetite up.” And you can initiate a prelude in spicy correspondence. Playful messages will cause interest, inflame both. You can start to seduce a man in a crowded place. Whisper vulgarity in his ear or talk about the lack of linen. In this situation, both will wait for the moment for privacy. And it will also become a prelude.